Renfield

“Renfield” is a 2023 horror/comedy/action movie starring Nicholas Hoult (Warm Bodies), Nicolas Cage (Vampire’s Kiss), and Awkwafina (Crazy Rich Asians).

Renfield (Hoult) is Dracula’s (Cage) familiar who does all his bidding. He starts to think there is a better life out there and starts going to codependent classes to help deal with his relationship with Dracula. Renfield has his own powers by feasting on bugs. While at a restaurant he gets caught up in middle of a mob shootout, instead of sitting idly by, he feasts on his bugs and stops the mob while saving a female cop (Awkwafina) in the process. Now Renfield finds new confidence to help him start a new life and leave Dracula. Only problem, is Dracula isn’t happy about it. So, now he has the mob plus Dracula are after him.

I was excited when the trailers first dropped for this one, but it wasn’t in theaters long enough for me to go see it. So, when it came out in Redbox I went and got it the same day. Nicholas Cage has come full circle, from thinking he’s a vampire in “Vampire’s Kiss” to playing Dracula in “Renfield”, and I love that. It looks hilarious, and it also stars Nicholas Hoult, who I love in “Warm Bodies.” So, how does it stack up to expectations?

First, it’s different than I thought. It looked like it would be a lot funnier than it was. Awkwafina is a funny comic, so adding her you would think it would be funnier than it is. It has an occasional funny joke, here and there, but that’s about it. Mostly the funny parts are on the trailer. It’s more action based, it is chalked full of fight scenes, most of them pretty gory. You get to see Hoult rip a guy’s arms off and beat everyone with them. Not to mention stomping and literally ripping people in half. Which I’m a fan of unique kill/gory fight scenes, so I’m all for it. Just wasn’t expecting it. Nicholas Cage and Hoult both play their parts great. Even though it’s not as much a horror comedy but more an action movie, it is still entertaining and worth watching. I give it a 7/10.

Vampire’s Kiss

I’m going old school with this one, all the way back to 1989 to “Vampire’s Kiss”. I’m actually a little surprised I haven’t seen this one before. “Vampire’s Kiss” is a 1989 Dark Comedy starring Nicholas Cage (National Treasure), Maria Conchita Alonso (The Running Man), Jennifer Beals (The Book of Eli), and Elizabeth Ashley (Just Getting Started).

A publishing executive (Cage) is bitten by a bat in his apartment, who he believes is a vampire. He starts to experience erratic behavior and starts to spiral out of control. Unfortunately for his secretary, she becomes the object of his focus.

This is easily the most ridiculous movie I have ever seen, and the whole reason is because of Nicholas Cage. It’s also one of the funniest movies I have ever seen because of him too. His acting is so over the top it is insane. All the eye popping and erratic memes you have seen of him is from this film. His facial expressions and body language are enough to make you cry with laughter. Nicholas Cage is supposed to be pretty eccentric in real life, I imagine this is how he really is just walking around. This film is going to leave you asking more questions than what it gives answers for, but just because how ridiculous he is in this, it’s worth it. It’s easily a movie I could watch over and over. I give it a 10/10. You can currently catch it on Tubi.

Jiu Jitsu

‘Jiu Jitsu’ is a 2020 action/martial arts movie starring Nicholas Cage (Willy’s Wonderland), Alain Moussi (Kickboxer: Retaliation), Eddie Steeples (My Name is Earl), Tony Jaa (Ong Bak 2), JuJu Chan Szeto (Wu Assassins). When an Alien race invades earth it’s up to a team of Jiu Jitsu fighters to stop them.

This movie is as bad as it sounds, painfully bad, I’m talking ‘Bad Batch’ bad. The main lead is Alain Moussi, if you look at his IMDb, the only thing this guy has done, and I’m talking his entire career, is be a stunt double. So his first big role is this movie, his acting is about as good as you would expect from a stuntman… not good. Like I stated in my review of ‘Willy’s Wonderland’ I don’t think there’s a role Cage won’t turn down at this point, he’s definitely fallen to the B actor category. Outside of Moussi’s bad acting, the acting in general across the board is bad. It comes across forced, and cheesy. The story has a ‘Mortal Kombat’ rip off feel, the Jiu Jitsu warriors are the chosen one’s just like earth’s chosen warriors in ‘Mortal Kombat’, and like ‘Mortal Kombat’ they must defend earth. I’m not saying ‘Mortal Kombat’ is the best written movie, but it does circles around ‘Jiu Jitsu’. The writing is bad, very cheesy, the lines are forced, and it randomly switches point of views. Just avoid this one all together, I’m sure the actors wish they had. I came close to throwing in the towel and not finishing this one, but I don’t think it’s a fair review if I give up watching the movie. I give it a 2.5/10. Only reason it even gets a 2.5 is because Tony Jaa is in it, and I like his other stuff.

Willy’s Wonderland

‘Willy’s Wonderland’ is a 2021 horror movie staring Nicholas Cage (National Treasure), Emily Tosta (Party of Five), Beth Grant (Donnie Darko), Ric Reitz (Safe Haven), Caylee Cowan (Bad Detectives), and Terayle Hill (House of Payne).

A quiet loner’s car (Cage) breaks down in a tiny rural town. The mechanic only accepts cash to fix the car, which the loner naturally doesn’t have, to pay off the debt he agrees to spend the night and clean up Willy’s Wonderland (think Chuck E. Cheese), an abandoned family fun center. Little does he know the animatronic band comes to life to feast on human blood, and he’s just a sacrifice.

I’ve been waiting for this movie to come to Redbox, I was really excited when this was first released. It was 20 dollars to watch on streaming sites, I’m all for supporting movies, especially since the movie industry has taken a huge hit due to the pandemic. With that said though, Nicholas Cage has fallen out of the A list celeb group into the B list Category. I can’t think of any of his movies that haven’t gone straight to DVD in the past few years, so 20 dollars for a B horror movie staring Nicholas Cage is a little steep. Alright back to the movie.

So this is basically ‘Five Nights at Freddy’s’ turned into a movie, if you’re unfamiliar with ‘Five Nights at Freddy’s’ it is a horror survival game where you play as a night employee at Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza, a fictional family fun center. Like this movie, the animatronics come to life at night, and you must defend yourself. Someone is a fan of this game and ran with it, and turned it into a movie, just amped up. This is the type of movie, you’re either going to like it or hate it. It’s a weird concept, Nicholas cage doesn’t say a word the entire movie, legit not one word, and Caylee Cowan plays a dumb bimbo who looks like she came out of ‘Little Shop of Horrors’. Not to mention once the animatronics start attacking Nicholas Cage, they look like bad mascot outfits. So yes, it’s weird. Surprisingly though, I really liked this film. The thing that bugged me the most was Caylee Cowan’s character, it was pointless, but watching a silent Nicholas Cage fight possessed animatronics to death is pretty awesome. I could easily see this movie becoming a cult classic. It’s not a quality movie, it’s like ‘Killer Klowns from Outer Space’ it’s so terrible and looks so bad that it actually is good, and Killer Klowns is a cult classic. Like I said it’s a weird movie and not for everyone, but I enjoyed it, I give it a 7/10. B list Nick Cage did not disappoint me.

The Croods: A New Age

First post of 2021, hopefully things will slowly get back to normal, and a big thank you to my readers. So lets kick it off with a review of ‘The Croods: A New Age’, a 2020 sequel to the 2013 film ‘The Croods’. Just like the first, this one brings an all-star cast starring Nicholas Cage (National Treasure), Emma Stone (Zombieland), Ryan Reynolds (Deadpool), Catherine Keener (The 40-Year-Old Virgin), Cloris Leachman (Young Frankenstein), Clark Duke (Kick-Ass), Leslie Mann (Knocked Up), and Peter Dinklage (Game of Thrones).

‘The Croods: A New Age’ does a great job of picking up where the last one left off. Guy and the Croods are still in search for the land of tomorrow, which they believe they found at last, but is inhabited with a family named the Betterman’s. The Betterman’s are a family that is superior and more sophisticated than cavemen. The Croods and the Betterman’s may have more in common than what they realize though.

It’s rare a sequel is as good or better than the first film. This one is better, it’s funnier, and has jokes both kids and the parents will both enjoy. I found myself laughing out loud more than once. There’s also more action in this one. Overall it’s a great movie, I give it a 8/10.